The Disciple Makers Blog

Multiplication Ministries | Church Dynamics International

Are You Running on Empty?

Pastors, elders and deacons are not the only church leaders that deal with burnout.  In fact, after 30 years of being a ministry I have often thought that the things I struggled with took an even greater toll on my wife Belle and our children.

Though this article is meant for everyone and certainly applies to anyone, it was originally written  targeting women…and written by a woman.  My pastor’s wife, Cindi McMenamin.  From this post you will see Cindi’s practical insights to life and life’s emotions and struggles.

Andy

How Do You Know When You’re Nearing Burnout?

By Cindi McMenamin

Author of  When You’re Running on Empty

Do you know how it feels to be running on empty?

I do. I’m not sure when it happened. It must have been a gradual process. But the day I realized I was feeling drained, and defeated, I knew something was wrong.   I’d lost my fire, my fervor, my fuel.

I’d written books on letting God meet your emotional needs, yet emotionally I was empty. I wrote about how God strengthens us through our alone times but I was feeling weakened.  I’d written a book on how to truly rest and I was feeling more overwhelmed than ever. And a year earlier I’d written a book on discovering and living out your dream and yet I was struggling with a lack of motivation.

What was wrong with me? Why was I feeling so complacent? Why did I have no motivation to continue forward?

I met with a doctor-friend of mine and his wife over lunch one day and talked about it.

“Burnout manifests itself in a certain activity you’re doing to the point that you’ve emptied the battery out,” said Dr. Jeff Birchall, who at that time was seeing a new person dealing with some sort of exhaustion, anxiety or depression every day…and following  up with about four every day.

Dr. Birchall said 50 percent of the population suffer from burnout at some point in their life, 10 percent at any given moment .

The symptoms of burnout? They sound a lot like the symptoms of running on empty:

  • chronic fatigue  (exhaustion, tiredness, a sense of being physically run down)
  • difficulty sleeping (waking in the middle of the night and finding yourself unable to return to sleep)
  • decreased concentration (can’t finish things)
  • anger at those making demands
  • self-criticism for putting up with the demands
  • cynicism, negativity, and irritability
  • a sense of being besieged
  • exploding easily at seemingly inconsequential things
  • frequent headaches and stomach aches
  • changes in appetite resulting in weight loss or gain
  • shortness of breath
  • increased irritability (men tend to get angry more; women tend to cry more)
  • social withdrawal
  • depression
  • feelings of helplessness

Maybe you can relate to some of those symptoms. Burnout can sometimes look like depression. Sometimes like anxiety. Some of us feel just a hint of it, like we’re getting our toes wet…others of us are drowning in it.

I knew I wasn’t in a state of depression.  I wasn’t suffering from anxiety. But I was tired, overwhelmed and frustrated. The fire of my relationship with God that once burned brightly now seemed to be barely flickering. The juices had dried up. The motivation was lost. I was running on empty.

My friend says some cases of burnout or exhaustion require medication. Some require counseling. And mostly all of the cases require a change of environment to get the balance they need in their life. That one was mine. I needed the balance. Too much striving, not enough trusting. Too much work, not enough rest. Too much expenditure, not enough filling. It was time for something to change.

I went to the Psalms – Scripture’s songs of human emotion – and related to the songwriters. They, too, experienced seasons of weariness and emptiness. They too cried out for help. And I began to notice a link between their cries for help while flat on their faces, and their ability to get back up on their feet again. What I saw in there, as that link, was a shift in focus (following times of prayer and praise) and a sense of determination.

The Psalmists often sang – in their songs of frustration and desperation – the words “I will” when it came to getting out of their slump.

Asaph, in Psalm 77, was disillusioned with the way life was going. But he said “I will meditate on all Thy works…I will remember your deeds.”

David, in asking God to consider his sighing and hear his cries for help, said “I will come into your house; in reverence willI bow down ” (Psalm 5:7). And when he felt like he was being defeated, he said “I will know that God is for me…I will not be afraid” (Psalm 56:9-11).

The Psalmists didn’t say  “I think” or “I feel” or “I should.” It was “I will” – a sense of determination – a determined course of action. In all 150 Psalms in the Bible, the phrase “I will” is sung at least 140 times. That told me something. It made me realize that – whether I feel empty or not, whether I am motivated or not  – I need to do something to allow God to infuse that energy into my life again. I needed to take whatever action would put me in the place where God could relight the fire in me and re-ignite the passion that once burned brightly. But I couldn’t wait until I felt like doing something, because the feeling might never come.

So I began to will to follow a course of action to keep focused (in my mind), keep fit (in my body) and keep fresh (in my soul). It involved simple things like starting my day right by starting it with prayer; acting on the facts of God’s Word, rather than my feelings;  keeping a good diet, keeping a clean heart, and keeping at it; and taking time to play, taking time to reflect, and taking time to re-ignite the flame of my love-ship with God. And as I began to follow this course of action, God met me where I was and infused that fuel back into my life.

For more on that course of action, or to derive principles from it that will work for you, see my book When You’re Running on Empty and save yourself from impending burnout.

____________________________________________________________________________

Well folks…care to share some burnout stories?  I tend to think that church workers, pastors and their wives are more at risk for burnout then any other profession or volunteer.

I highly recommend Cindi as both a woman’s speaker and author.

Andy

______________________________________________________________________________________ 

Cindi McMenamin is a national speaker and the author of several books. Her books, free resources and ministry helps are available at  www.strengthforthesoul.com. For discounts on her books for small group studies, email her directly at Cindi@StrengthForTheSoul.com.

No Comments by Pastor Andy on September 2, 2010
filed in Church Growth and Health, Pastors

Is there joy in your ministry?

THE JOY METER

Click here to request this resource By H.B. London

Of late, I have been in contact with a great number of clergy who have lost the joy in ministry. They are struggling to maintain their enthusiasm for what they do.

So, this week, I was reading in my devotional book — Pause, Recharge, Refresh — and, on page 199, I ran across something I wrote several years ago. I thought the selection “The Joy Meter” might encourage you. I pray so.

In the book of Hebrews are words written to a group of people about their pastors: “Obey them so that their work will be a joy, not a burden” (Heb. 13:17).

I thought a bit about what that phrase really means, “joy, not a burden.” I’m sure it does not mean people are just to be robot yes-men to their pastors. Rather, they are to honor the calling of their pastors and conduct themselves in a way that brings joy to pastoring.

What would make ministry joyful for you?

  • People who continue to show growth in their walk with the Lord.
  • People who have a genuine concern for their brothers and sisters in the faith.
  • People who do not turn a deaf ear to the lost.
  • People who walk by faith and not by sight.
  • People who pray rather than faint.
  • People who are drawn to peace rather than contention.
  • People whose self-image is based on who they are in Christ rather than what they accomplish by themselves.
  • People who pass the torch of righteousness to the next generation.
  • People who love the church and give themselves to it.

“I think each of us has a “joy meter.” Please don’t let yours be based on what happens around you more than on your contentment in Christ and the job He has given you to do. Rejoice!

“Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer” (Rom. 12:12).

This article comes from a weekly publication called The Pastor’s Weekly Briefing and comes directly to your email.  If Good Morning, Colleagueyou want to be on H.B. London’s email list to receive this helpful email you can send a request to family@mail-family.org
So tell me.  What brings you joy in ministry?   You don’t have to be a pastor to answer that as we are all in ministry to some degree.
Andy
No Comments by Pastor Andy on August 27, 2010
filed in Church Growth and Health, Pastors

So your church is small…Is that such a bad thing?

Good Things in Small Packages

By

Most Christians are in small churches. Though megachurches usually get more attention, small churches are the backbone of Christianity. People are more likely to come to faith in a small church than in a megachurch.

M0st congregations are small, averaging less than 100 people in attendance, so it is important to understand how small churches function. They are not miniature imitations of multi-ministry megachurches. Rather, they have a dynamic of their own, often a slower pace and a more friendly face.

Our small churches will be a little different from small Baptist, Methodist or Presbyterian churches. Our history and our geographical circumstances will make some things different for us. Yet we can learn from other small churches some ideas that may help us in our own.

Small churches are not confined to small towns—they are found in the biggest cities, too. Some are dying, but others are thriving, and God is doing a remarkable work through them. We need to see what small churches do best, so we can make the most of our strengths, and not try to be something we are not. If Christ has made us a little toe in his body, we want to be the best little toe we can be.

Strengths

Small churches have several important strengths:

  • Relationships. People know one another and care about one another. If someone is missing, others notice. When big churches set up small groups, they are trying to imitate something that comes naturally to a small church.
  • Involvement. Everyone gets actively involved in the church. A high percentage of people have assigned duties: setup, cleanup, ushering, greeting, sound system, music, scripture reading, teaching children and speaking.
  • Stability. Large churches may lose five percent of their members each year. Small churches retain members better, partly through involvement and largely through relationships.

In general, the larger the church, the more business-like it must function. The senior pastor must be an executive, an administrator. The programs of the church must be well organized, well coordinated, professionally done. There must be a clear organizational structure. Small churches tend to function more informally, more through the relationship networks of the church. Decisions are made more on how they affect people, and less on logic.

Church management textbooks are usually designed for mid-size and larger churches, so their advice doesn’t always work in the small church. This is especially true when it comes to programs or ministries. The books say, the more the better. Have something for every age group, every need, every day. This is impossible for the small church. The small church cannot offer the same array of special-interest ministries. It cannot follow the same methods and expect the same results. It cannot have the same kind of children’s ministry or the same kind of youth group. But neither does it neglect them.

Small churches tend to have activities in which everyone is involved: seniors, teens, singles and marrieds. The activity is a success if most of the congregation comes. Small churches don’t always have a designated women’s ministry—the women are already involved in ministry. They don’t have a big teen ministry—they involve their teens in ministry and activities anyway. They may have only a tiny children’s class, but they make sure that the children enjoy it and feel welcome at church.

I make these observations not to provide an excuse for small churches to abandon ministries they ought to have, but simply to point out that a small church doesn’t have to have everything. Women, teens, children and men should all be involved in the church. Small churches cannot do everything, but each one can do something, and they need to do it as best they can.

“Researcher George Barna has observed that the most effective churches deliberately limit their ministries, focusing on those specific areas for which they have resources and in which they have the ability to serve with excellence. If even large churches have to observe this principle to be effective, how much more do small churches whose resources are even more limited need to follow it?” (No Little Places, Klassen and Koessler, p. 90).

Making decisions

The pastor’s role in a small church is more relational. Leadership is exercised less by command and more by consensus-building. Members want good sermons, but they want good relationships even more. They want pastors who love them, who care for them. They will reject his ideas (no matter how good they are) if he doesn’t love the people.

It takes time for a pastor to build these relationships, to build the trust needed to lead. It usually takes several years. The pastor needs to learn the culture of the church and how to work within that culture. The pastor needs to know how to suggest ideas, whom to suggest them to and how to implement the ideas the members have.

Pastors grow in influence by spending time with members, by visiting the sick, by performing funerals and weddings, by caring about the people. He initiates change more by asking questions, by helping people see the need for change, than by having all the answers.

Churches need leadership, or else they stagnate. Pastors need to be optimistic about what God is doing in the church, and what he can do in the church. Pastors need to help members be excited about the mission, to have a clear idea of what they are doing. This leads to growth.

Healthy small churches grow. Growth can affect the relationship networks within the church, and because of that, some members may resist growth. They do not want new people taking the pastor’s time away from them. They do not want new people taking ministry roles away from them.

Growth means change, and some people have a low tolerance for change. Change means conflict. But a refusal to change means slow death. “We may have to choose between the past and the future, between clinging to our old ways and having a vital church for our children and grandchildren” (Klassen and Koessler, p. 61). If we want our church to survive, we must be willing to change.

Growth

How do small churches grow? It is generally through personal relationships, through members inviting friends and relatives to church. People may be invited for special programs, or simply for a weekly worship service, but the invitation begins with a relationship.

When people visit a small church, they should be warmly welcomed. The greeter or usher does not just shake hands and give a songbook—the greeter begins a relationship, making the person feel loved, making sure the visitor gives his or her name and address in the guest book.

In many small churches, there is follow-up within the week. A lay member brings cookies, fruit or some gift to say, We’re glad you visited. The church is building on its strength: relationships. The church is saying: We care. We like you. We want you back. Love is the water that helps the seeds sprout and grow.

The most important ingredient in church growth is the members’ attitudes about their church. They make no apologies for their small size. They belong to the church and are involved in the church not because of its music or its building, but because God is working in the church, and they want to be where God is. When people are excited about what God is doing in their lives, when they see the church as a place in which God works, they find it much easier to invite people. “Come and see,” they say. “I think you’ll like it.”

In our impersonal, technological world, many people are looking for greater meaning to life, something spiritual, something that gives them community and friends. Some try to find this in a bar; others find it in small churches. The people who care about them convince them that God cares about them.

Small churches must look toward God. He’s the one who has set us in our places, and he wants us to be the best we can be, to bloom even if we are a little plant. As long as we are small, we want to be the best small church that we can be.

“One half of all Protestant churches in the United States and Canada average fewer than 75 at worship, and a fourth average fewer than 35″ (Schaller, p. 58).

___________________________________________________________________________________

Small congregations have more in common with other small churches than they do with larger congregations in the community, or in their denominational communion” (Dudley, p. 16).

__________________________________________________________________________

“Too many small-membership churches spend an excessive amount of time lamenting their weaknesses, bemoaning their shortcomings and emphasizing their limitations. A more productive approach is to identify, affirm, and plan to build on strengths” (Schaller, p. 73).

_________________________________________________________________________

“God wants us to use what we have, not moan about what we don’t have…. God will not hold you accountable to match the deeds and ministries of a larger church. You will be accountable, however, to be the best small church you can possibly be” (Bierly, p. 75).

__________________________________________________________________________

“In a big world, the small church has remained intimate. In a fast world, the small church has been steady. In an expensive world, the small church has remained plain. In a complex world, the small church has remained simple. In a rational world, the small church has kept feelings. In a mobile world, the small church has been an anchor. In an anonymous world, the small church calls us by name—by nickname! As a result, small churches have survived where others have failed” (Dudley, p. 176).

Resources for small churches

  • Steve Bierly, Help for the Small-Church Pastor. Zondervan, 1995.
  • Ron Crandall, Turnaround Strategies for the Small Church. Abingdon, 1995.
  • Carl Dudley, Making the Small Church Effective. Abingdon, 1978.
  • Ron Klassen and John Koessler, No Little Places. Baker, 1996.
  • Lyle Schaller, The Small Church Is Different! Abingdon, 1982.

    Dr. Joseph Tkach

has been president of Grace Communion International since 1995. He holds a Doctor of Ministry degree from Azusa Pacific University.

http://www.gci.org/church/small

So are you the pastor or do you attend a small church?  Tell me what makes your church so special.  Each church has something unique about it and I’d like to hear what it is.  I’m sure it could be encouraging to the readers of The Disciple Makers.

My small church has the best worship music that a small church could hope for, plus it’s a real caring family.

Andy

No Comments by Pastor Andy on August 24, 2010
filed in Church Growth and Health

Many pastors are burned out, worn down and ready to quit

Any pastor reading this can identify with the content all too much and we all have wished that members of our churches understood.  After reading this maybe you can add some thoughts about burning out?  Or an example.  Or even how you prevent it from happening.  By the way, not only pastors can burn out…their families can and any other person in the church that doesn’t know how to draw a line and know the difference from serving God to enough is enough.

Andy

Pastor Burnout Causes

Why Pastors Are Under So Much Stress

Many authors condense pastor burnout causes down to four or five. I’m afraid I can’t even get close to that. I started writing and all I could simplify causes of burnout to was 53.

Some time ago I was sharing about pastor burnout causes in a Sunday school class and a man interjected a few comments. He said, “What makes pastors different from everyone else? Everyone wants to quit their jobs sometimes, everyone would like a better job, what makes pastors so different?”

My answer is this: it’s true that everyone endures stressful jobs that at times they’d like to quit. But few – if any – other jobs endure as much constant stress as pastors. The sheer volume of daily stress placed on pastors is so overwhelming that pastors are all but assured of getting burned out unless they take precautionary measures to prevent it.

As a more extensive answer to my Sunday school answer (above), I offer these 53 pastor burnout causes. Looking to overcome burnout? Read this page for answers.

Burned Out Pastor

Administration Burnout Causes

  • Pastors generally spend too much time on low-reward activities.
  • Pastors have to do to much administration – correspondence, bulletins, newsletters, web site, organizing activities, attending unnecessary meetings, ensuring that things get done, buying graduation and baptism gifts, purchasing janitorial supplies, making sure rooms are set up for meetings, etc.
  • Pastors often have to deal with many distractions such as, mail, email, sales people, phone calls, text messages, etc.
  • In many churches, pastors are given a lot of responsibilities, but very little authority.
  • Because churches are organizations, pastors sometimes feel like they are constantly attending endless – and often meaningless – meetings.

Family Burnout Causes

  • There is tremendous pressure to have a perfect family.
  • Marital strife is common with pastors and their spouses. The constent stress caused by unrealistic expectations, inadequate finances, little time spent alone together all wear on a marriage.
  • Pressure to be an effective parent when your exhausted, overworked, overwhelmed, and spend too much time away from home at night strains the parent-child relationship. This also adds pressure to the pastor’s spouse.
  • A pastor’s spouse and kids are often criticized.

Expectations Burnout Causes

  • People who don’t understand and are not sympathetic. I had one friend ask me, “Isn’t paying our pastor enough appreciation?”
  • A pastor’s work is never done. It goes with you through phone calls, reading books, discussions with his spouse about church; and now with email and cell phones, people have immediate access to their pastor.
  • Every church has it’s politics. Various groups have different agendas and expectations. The pastor finds himself right in the middle of it all.
  • There is a strong expectation for a pastor to be equally as effective with every age group.
  • Pastors bear the burden of unfulfilled expectations. This disheartens, confuses, and can create a “blame game.” It may also lead to bitterness or resentment against people or God.
  • Because of perfectionistic expectations, denial, pride, and fear of telling anyone about their real weaknesses, failures, fears, stresses, and discouragements, pastors are some of the least likely to seek help – from counselors, doctors, friends, co-workers, or even from ministries like PastorCare.
  • It’s difficult to establish boundaries. How do you say, “No,” if something really needs to be done? How do you say, “No,” when someone drops by your house? Can you say, “No,” if someone stops by the office while you are studying? Or, if someone needs you to unlock the church, or turn up the heat, or close the church windows?
  • In a sense, pastors preach and teach as hypocrites – and this causes significant stress. They call for holiness that they struggle to achieve themselves. This duality challenges a pastor and causes him to keep his own struggles secret.
  • People often expect their pastor to be a spiritual giant. They assume that pastors all rise before dawn to pray, study for hours, and visit the sick and shut ins.
  • Pastors are expected to be able to preach, teach, and pray at a moment’s notice.
  • Pastors are expected to have all the answers – know off the top of their head where any verse is, answer any bible question.
  • Appreciation is rare. People just expect him to do his job. After all, “We pay him, isn’t that appreciation enough?”
  • Consumerism permeates the church. People want the church to serve their needs, but are less willing to help meet others needs.
  • People expect the pastor to be everything to everyone. Though no single group says that, each group believes that the pastor needs to spend more time with them. One man said to me, you are an excellent preacher/teacher but a horrible pastor. So we are going to leave the church. A couple said to me, I know that Monday is your day off, but you could at least attend our Monday youth meetings. Some people love topical sermons while others demand expository sermons. Another elderly woman got mad at me because I didn’t offer to pick her up for an activity. The janitor’s wife hollered at my wife because the ladies group forgot to take a casserole out of the church oven. Everyone thinks the pastor needs to be everything.
  • Many churches harness pastors with legalistic expectations. Don’t go to movies, drink no alcohol, don’t play cards, etc.
  • Congregations often pressure pastors to always be at the top of their game. They want their pastors to be happy, strong in faith – not burnt out or discouraged.

Financial Causes of Burnout

  • Pastors generally stress about finances. As a profession, pastors are some of the most educated people and some of the lowest paid as well.
  • Feeling pressure to watch what he/she spends. No new car. A feeling that he has to explain the deal or coupon used to buy something.
  • Do you like to write? Do you enjoy working on the web? Here is a practical way to increase your salary.

Conflict Reasons for Burnout

  • Constantly dealing with critics. Someone is always unhappy about something.
  • The pastor is constantly putting out little fires… petty conflict wears on a pastor.
  • When a pastor makes himself vulnerable and open, the information is often turned into a weapon.
  • People in church aren’t willing to move out of their comfort zones and get beyond the “come to us” mentality. My wife and I have endured several periods of severe pain in our lives. We needed the ministry of the church body. But it never came because we didn’t attend enough services.

Sin Burnout Causes

  • There are tremendous temptations to moral compromise. The overwhelming amount of stress on a pastor causes him to seek temporary relief, distractions. Food, TV, computer games, and such can become over used distractions. But greater temptations to pornography, laziness, a flirtatious lifestyle, secret fantasies, and even affairs, are all lurking, ready to pounce on a pastor at a moment’s notice. All of these things increase a pastor’s stress as they pull a pastor into a cycle of sin, confession, sin again, guilt that it’s getting out of control, a sense of failure, a search for something to make him feel better, more sin, guilt, etc.
  • Pressure and stress push pastors to find escapes – some are good, like golf. Others can be destructive, like alcohol, prescription drugs, pornography, suicide, mental fantasies, TV, food, etc.

Self-Perception Causes

  • Ambiguity of success or failure. It’s very difficult to know if he/she is succeeding.This causes significant stress.
  • In every church there are people who think too highly of the pastor and those who think too lowly of the pastor.

Theological Burnout Causes

  • Theologically we find ourselves living in between periods… between the now and not yet. Pastors see the worst of humanity and yet constantly read, study, and teach about the rule of a perfect, righteous, sovereign, good King.
  • Pastors have to explain life to their congregants. “Why did my baby die?” “Why did my husband leave me?” Earthquakes, hurricanes, traffic accidents, and terrorism. How can a pastor have all the answers?

Psychological Reasons for Burnout

  • Counseling people’s problems. If people knew what pastors knew about others in the church, they’d be amazed and discouraged too.
  • Most pastors feel unprepared and/or unable to do their job well.
  • It’s difficult to balance leadership and servant hood at the same time.
  • People seek their pastor for counseling – but rarely follow through on advice.
  • Most pastors are lonely. They spend time with men in the church but as a pastor. He occasionally meets with other pastors but expectations are so high, it’s difficult to be real.
  • Pastors are tempted to overestimate their importance. People look up to us, respect us, ask us for advice. That elevates our own feelings of authority.
  • Pastors are some of the quickest people to identify depression, stress and burnout in other people. But they are also very slow to identify it in themselves.

Spiritual Burnout Causes

  • A constant cycle of preaching that seems to accomplish little. So much preaching feels like you’re on a treadmill and dries a pastor out spiritually.
  • Preaching and teaching so frequently leaves the pastor spiritually dry.

Schedule Burnout Causes

  • Every person in the congregation is the pastor’s boss. They assume it is ok to stop by, call, or ask for something whenever they want.
  • Unmanageable schedules. Most pastors work more than 50 hours a week.
  • Pastors generally don’t get enough time away. They need at least three weeks of vacation and one week of retreat each year. And I prefer four weeks of vacation plus a week retreat each year. A pastor in S. Africa told me that he receives 10 weeks vacation each year! I’m not sure we’ll ever see that in the USA.
  • There are people who simply suck the life out of pastors. There is a saying among pastors: “Beware the person who picks you up at the airport.” This is not to be taken literally. It simply means that there are people who will try to take up too much of the pastor’s time and try to become the best friend of the pastor.
  • Because of all of the other stresses mentioned here, pastor’s lives often seem out of control.

Health Clergy Burnout Causes

  • Pastors are notorious for being in poor health. I’m envious of those pastors who run five miles a day. But those pastors are rare. Too many potlucks and too much sitting at a desk primes a pastor for health problems.
  • People lean on pastors for strength and encouragement but pastors have few if any people they can lean on.

Burnout Causes Conclusion

These 53 burnout causes are really stressors that lead to burnout. In and of themselves, they are not symptoms of burnout. But they certainly lead to burnout. After a list of these burnout causes, you might need a little humor.

Read this page for answers to overcoming burnout

Thanks to our nameless brother over at pastorburnout.com for his fine work on this subject.

OK…I’d like to hear your thoughts on this subject. I’ve been there a few times myself and have some input on dealing with the issue, but I would like to hear yours first.

Andy

No Comments by Pastor Andy on August 22, 2010
filed in Pastors

Pastors being abused? Say it ain’t so…please!

PASTOR ABUSE  

By Andy McAdams

I am involved on a regular basis with the process of examining candidates for ordination as they enter the pastorate.  I am always thrilled with the enthusiasm of these young ministers to be and remember back 35 years ago when I was a 25-year-old pastor ready to change the world.  But I can’t look back without also being concerned for these rookie preachers, because experience has taught me that along with some wonderful church members that are a blessing, also comes those that are the self appointed guardians of “keeping things the same”, for fear of losing control.  Make no mistake about it…every church has them and they often make ministry a living hell and many times chase away good pastors right out of the ministry, that could have made a difference.  In fact I often joke that during the ordination service when other ordained ministers lay hands to pray and set the candidate apart for ministry, that one of us will place a target on his back and be sure that church people won’t hesitate to take aim for it.

Did this happen to me?  Of course it did but that’s another story for another post.  What prompted me to write and post this article is that I received an email this week that did two things.

The first thing was that it put an ache in my heart and brought me to tears. It came from a young pastor that I had only met a couple of times but took a liking to right away.  He had such high hopes and was prepared to do something great for God and I believed that he was not only ready to do so, but had the ability to do so.

Here is his email…it’s brief but says so much.

Andy,

Hope all is well.  Great stuff (on the blog) I’m sure.  I couldn’t find the link for you to take me off the e-mail.  I’m not pastoring anymore and it just brings up to much pain seeing this stuff.  Thank you much!

Name withheld

Tell me something.  Just how sad is that?  It breaks my heart and from what I know about this situation, this young man didn’t deserve what happened.

The second thing I did was picking up a book that I bought a few years ago but for some reason I never read it.   I am now.

The book is called “Pastor Abuse” by Bob Hellmann and is a lot like a couple of books I read decades ago when I fell under attack not from Satan directly, but from CHURCH PEOPLE. “The Walk on Water Syndrome” and “They Cry Too”, I doubt if they are still in print but the titles speak for themselves.

The promotional write up and table of contents about Mr. Hellmann’s “Pastor Abuse”, book tells a huge story also.  Here they are:

Every day 50 pastors quit the ministry! Many denominations do not have enough pastors to serve all of their churches. Thousands of other churches are looking for a pastor. Why are pastors leaving the ministry? When over 18,000 pastors quit pastoring each year, there have to be reasons for it. There ARE reasons why pastors and their wives are discouraged, hurt, sick, burned out, and leaving. The answer is that the people in the pews are abusing their pastors and driving them away! Are YOU abusing YOUR pastor?

Table of Contents

1. Who is a Pastor?
2. I Quit!
3. Be My Holy Spirit
4. Here Today, Gone Tomorrow
5. “Lord, You Keep the Pastor Humble, and We Will Keep Him Poor.”
6. Staff Disloyalty
7. The Pastor’s Health
8. False Pastors
9. How to Treat Your Pastor
10. The Need for Reconciliation

Frankly I find it sad that books like this needs to be written, but they do.  Maybe this explains why 4,000 churches close every year.  It’s just too bad that the goals, dreams and visions of so many pastors are destroyed in the process.


To order Bob Hellmann’s book go here:

http://www.bobhellmann.org/PastorAbuse.html

Now…here is what I’d like you to do.  Tells me about cases where pastors have been treated wrongly that you are aware of or witnessed.  If you’re the pastor that has been abused tell us about it.  Have you taken part in a situation where a pastor was mistreated and regret it?  I would suggest that you sign in anonymously to tell your story if you like.

Andy



5 Comments by Pastor Andy on August 17, 2010
filed in Pastors

Pastors at risk – dangerous career

I’m a statistic person but the ones in this post I wish were wrong.  I came across a helpful website called “Pastor Burn Out” and it instantly because a source for me as I work with pastors from day to day.  Like most pastors I have been at the burnout stage and when it happens we can never really put our fingers on why or how it happened.  All we know is, “we’ve had it and ready to walk away from it all”.  Some do…some stick it out yet with little joy for ministry and others find answers and help through organizations like ours.  This article is a must read even if you’re not a pastor.  After all, you probably have a pastor or know one.  All we ask is that church people understand that we don’t walk on water and we struggle with the same issues of life that they do. The following statistics may not be new to you.  They come from H.B. London, but they always challenge me to do something to help men and women called of God that are ready to walk away from their pulpits once and for all.  Andy


Pastor Burnout by the Numbers 

  • 13% of active pastors are divorced.
  • Those in ministry are equally likely to have their marriage end in divorce as general church members.
  • The clergy has the second highest divorce rate among all professions.
  • 23% have been fired or pressured to resign at least once in their careers.
  • 25% don’t know where to turn when they have a family or personal conflict or issue.
  • 25% of pastors’ wives see their husband’s work schedule as a source of conflict.
  • 33% felt burned out within their first five years of ministry.
  • 33% say that being in ministry is an outright hazard to their family.
  • 40% of pastors and 47% of spouses are suffering from burnout, frantic schedules, and/or unrealistic expectations.
  • 45% of pastors’ wives say the greatest danger to them and their family is physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual burnout.
  • 45% of pastors say that they’ve experienced depression or burnout to the extent that they needed to take a leave of absence from ministry.
  • 50% feel unable to meet the needs of the job.
  • 52% of pastors say they and their spouses believe that being in pastoral ministry is hazardous to their family’s well-being and health.
  • 56% of pastors’ wives say that they have no close friends.
  • 57% would leave the pastorate if they had somewhere else to go or some other vocation they could do.
  • 70% don’t have any close friends.
  • 75% report severe stress causing anguish, worry, bewilderment, anger, depression, fear, and alienation.
  • 80% of pastors say they have insufficient time with their spouse.
  • 80% believe that pastoral ministry affects their families negatively.
  • 90% feel unqualified or poorly prepared for ministry.
  • 90% work more than 50 hours a week.
  • 94% feel under pressure to have a perfect family.
  • 1,500 pastors leave their ministries each month due to burnout, conflict, or moral failure.
  • Doctors, lawyers and clergy have the most problems with drug abuse, alcoholism and suicide.

The hardest thing about these numbers is that the numbers only tell half the story. The other half is that congregations don’t know or understand the nature of pastoral stress. And when a pastor breaks

www.pastorburnout.com

down or has a moral failure, congregations, for lack of a better word, “kick the pastor to the curb.”

Whether you are a pastor, a former pastor, or a congregation member, I hope these clergy burnout statistics help clarify the problem. And more importantly, I hope they help you focus your ministry to pastors.

_________________________________________________

I searched all over pastor burnout .com trying to find the name of the creator of this helpful site.  He never identified himself my name.  Instead he simply presented his story of pastoring that actually led him to attempting suicide.  God has used his past situation to help pastors all over to deal with this issue of “pastoral burnout”, in a very healing and helpful way.  I plan on posting a number of articles from his site on The Disciple Makers or you can get a preview and visit the site yourself at www.pastorburnout.com  I only wish that someone like this dear brother was around when I spent my 30 years in pastoral ministry.

I especially need your comments on this subject so that as I travel and work with pastors that I can be the help that they need.

Andy

7 Comments by Pastor Andy on August 14, 2010
filed in Pastors

Questions from Pastors and their wives…How would you advise?

Many of you may receive the weekly email publication from H.B. London with Focus on the Family called, “The Pastor’s Weekly Briefing”.  I received mine just moments ago and the lead article reached out and got my attention.  As someone that works with pastors most everyday of my life, I am concerned about their issues and unanswered questions.   Some of those questions were expressed at a recent retreat with H.B.   I wonder how you would respond to some of the following questions posed by pastors and their wives.  Andy

MOST ASKED QUESTIONS

Do you recall the exchange Jesus had with His disciples over His own identity? “When Jesus came to the region of Caesarea Philippi, he asked his disciples, ‘Who do people say the son of man is?’” They gave some answers, and then He asked, “Who do you say I am?” (Matt. 16:13, 15). Simon Peter got it right.

This week at our latest Focus on the Family Pastor and Spouse Retreat, we in leadership were asked a lot of questions that referenced both our ministry and clergy needs. Here are some of those questions:

  • My wife (a pastor’s wife) is struggling in her role — lots of depression. Is there help for her?
  • It seems like the pastors in our community have so much going on that it is difficult for us to maintain any continuity with each other. What can we do to encourage one another?
  • The church seems like it is floundering. What can we do to renew enthusiasm for the Great Commission?
  • I have been a pastor for 15 years. It has not been easy. I can’t imagine what the next 15 years will be like.  What do you suggest?
  • Everyone is talking about the “emergent church.” What is that?
  • One of my colleagues has put his ministry in jeopardy because of some poor decisions. Should I confront him?
  • The power base in my congregation is making it very difficult for us to keep up with the changes taking place in the church at large. Will I always be faced with these influencers?
  • I am really tired. My people do not understand the pressures most pastors face. Who can help them?
  • I am overwhelmed. How do I untangle?

Well, it is easy to ask questions, but pretty difficult to just throw out a casual answer. We really do need face time with one another, don’t we? If you had a question to ask, what would your question be?  I would really like to know. E-mail us at pastors@family.org.

So, be blessed and be a blessing. —HBL

____________________________________________________________________________________

One of the reasons I posted this article is I am curious what sort of counsel would be offered to some of these questions from pastors and their wives.  So…how about picking one or two of them and telling us how you would answer them.  You don’t need to be a pastor or a pastor’s wife to have an opinion and response, so let’s hear what you have to say.  BTW…if you’re not getting H.B. London’s “Pastor’s Weekly Briefing” visit his web site and request it.

Andy

1 Comment by Pastor Andy on August 12, 2010
filed in Pastors

Attention Pastor, Leaders and other kinda Church People

Brandon A. Cox wrote this article for pastors, but as I read it I thought about so many church leaders and members of a church that seem to get so busy doing churchy stuff that they miss the God they serve.  I have fallen into that trap a few times.  How about you?  Andy

Don’t Forget Your Soul

by Brandon on 29. Jul, 2010 in Leadership

This is the age of innovative ministry techniques and methodologies. We’re mad with creativity, which I love, but at times we can be right in the midst of innovation and be missing out on developing something so much more vital – our souls.

I went through a period quite a few years ago in which all I was reading were books on growth, health, techniques, trends, etc. What I wasn’t doing, and need to be, was soaking in the classics, devotional reading, and deepening my theology. So Pastor, here are three things we need to remember in the midst of our rapid ministerial pace…

Our Theology Can Always Use Deepening

Most systematic theologies will organize biblical doctrine around anywhere from ten to twenty major topics. There are four specific areas of theology that stand out in my mind as being vital to a Pastor’s soul-health:

  • The theology of our pastoral calling. Who is it exactly God is calling me to be? is really more important than what are the tasks God has called me to do?
  • The theology of our message. It’s vital that our respect for the word of God continues to be elevated. It’s the source of our confidence in the pulpit and in life.
  • Our theology of heaven and hell. Eternity hangs in the balance and the degree to which we are not only believing biblical truths about eternity, but the degree to which we focus our thoughts on them directly relates to our approach to the great commission itself.
  • Our theology of Jesus. Ministry really ought to be about chasing the Person of Christ, not chasing a passion for organizational growth or ministerial success.

Our Relationships Can Always Use Attention

We often work so hard at establishing and growing relationships with our church family and our community that we forget about growing our relationship with our wife and kids, our brethren (co-laborers in ministry), and with friends whose connection with us is independent of our being their shepherd.

We can ALWAYS Use Greater Personal Growth

I mean that statement spiritually in the sense that if our quiet time and connection with Jesus flames out, we’re toast professionally anyway. But I also mean that professionally. Sometimes I fall into the habit of trying to be a content producer and an influencer to the neglect of allowing myself to be shaped and influenced by other leaders, by books, and all the great content there is to consume.

In the midst of reaching people, doing ministry, preparing sermons, and growing a church, don’t forget the soul stuff

Brandon A. Cox

Brandon is first and foremost a follower of Jesus Christ. He’s a husband to Angie and a Dad to Ella Grace and Samuel David.  He’s a Pastor at Saddleback Church, Editor of Fuel Your Blogging and also a logo and web designer.

What do you think? Do you struggle in one of these areas, or some area  not mentioned? And what helps you feed the soul?

2 Comments by Pastor Andy on August 7, 2010
filed in Church Growth and Health

Pastors That Last need to… TAKE A BREAK!

This article is taken from H.B. London’s “Pastor’s Weekly Briefing” and it couldn’t be more true.  I’m afraid in the 30 years that I was a senior pastor I didn’t heed this kind of advice.  Frankly…my health has suffered for it and I wonder if I even cut a few years off of my life.  Pastor…I encourage you to take this seriously.  Church member…I encourage you to help take care of your pastor so he can be one of those that last.  Andy

Take a Break

While we read in Genesis that God rested on the seventh day, a growing number of ministers are finding that there is more work — and stress — than ever before, and fewer opportunities to unwind. The result has been a myriad of health problems among the clergy — from a lack of exercise, poor eating habits, more hypertension, a rise in obesity, problems of depression and substance abuse, higher rates of arthritis and asthma, and all of the ills of modern life that pastors spend so much time trying to help their congregants tackle. And many of these are at higher rates than most Americans.

A national survey in 2001 of more than 2,500 Christian religious leaders conducted by Duke Divinity School showed that 76 percent of Christian clergy were either overweight or obese, 15 percentage points higher than for the general U.S. population. And other research has shown that clergy across all faiths are succumbing to higher rates of obesity, hypertension, diabetes and other ailments than their congregants.

What are some of the reasons for this decrease in health?

  • Some experts say the situation may be aggravated by the recession, with donations down and more financial challenges for pastors on the job.
  • The culture and economy are also causing many difficulties for the members of their congregations, which pastors feel they must try to address.
  • Clergy routinely work 60-hour weeks and often have just one day off — and not the day everyone else is off. That makes it hard to develop friendships and creates a lot of loneliness.
  • Nearly every function a pastor attends is likely to have food — and not necessarily healthy fare — that he or she is expected to share.
  • A clergy shortage in many faiths leaves pastors overworked, overstressed, underpaid, and too often a lone ranger with little support from other ministers or the congregation.
  • Like other service professions, pastors are expected to be available at all times, whether it is the dinner hour or on vacation. They have “boundary issues,” which means they are too easily overtaken by the urgency of other people’s needs.
  • Pastors are often designated the holiest member of the congregation, who can be in all places at all times. But unlike doctors or police, they are supposed to be people who have dedicated their lives to a spiritual goal and are not expected to focus on themselves, their own welfare or their families.
  • The root of the stress is that, for a minister, work centers around so many different relationships and the demand that he or she be all things to all people.
  • Pastors start thinking that things like their church will be their legacy instead of their families, which knocks them out of balance and “whacks” their own relationships with Christ.

As cell phones and social media expose ministers to new dimensions of stress, and as health care costs soar, some of the country’s largest denominations have begun wellness campaigns for their spiritual leaders. At the center of nearly all of these programs is more rest.

“We had a pastor in our study group who hadn’t taken a vacation in 18 years,” said Rae Jean Proeschold-Bell, an assistant professor of health research at Duke University.

A United Methodist Church directive proclaimed, “Time away can bring renewal and help prevent burnout.” Episcopal, Baptist and Lutheran churches have all undertaken health initiatives that place special emphasis on the need for pastors to take vacations and observe “Sabbath days,” their weekday time off in place of Sundays.

A program called the National Clergy Renewal Program, funded by the Lilly Foundation, has been underwriting sabbaticals for pastors for several years. The program will provide up to $50,000 to 150 congregations in the coming year. And places like the Alban Institute are studying the topic and offering expertise and resources to denominations trying to make their clergy healthier.

But experts say the solutions have to start at the congregation level. Congregants can encourage pastors to take time off, and not view everything in the church as his or her responsibility. They can provide healthy foods at church events. But clergy themselves must find time to exercise and to relax, even if it means saying no to some requests. Otherwise, they will not be healthy enough to serve their flocks later. They must recognize that long hours and porous boundaries between one’s work life and personal life is an occupational hazard.

Rev. Peter Scazzero, pastor of New Life Fellowship Church in Elmhurst, Queens, N.Y., begins his advice by rejecting the constant-growth ethic that has contributed to the explosion of so-called mega-churches. He also advocates more vacation time for members of the clergy, Sabbath-keeping, and a “rhythm of stopping,” or daily praying, that he learned from the silent order of Trappist monks. He was forced to make a change to live more consciously and less compulsively by his depression and alienation from his wife and four children. “The insight I gained from the Trappists is that being too ‘busy’ is an impediment to one’s relationship with God.” [The New York Times, PoliticsDaily.com]

9 Comments by Pastor Andy on August 6, 2010
filed in Uncategorized

Mark of the Beast – Are we getting closer and what’s Walmart got to do with it?

I have read on a number of web sites and in books about where and how the “Image of the Beast” is going to come into play near the end of human history.  Often I have read about the possibility of a microchip being planted on people’s hand between the thumb and forefinger.  To be honest with you I always placed it down, until I ran across an article on American Consumer News.com that I am posting below.  It’s rather eye opening. Looks more and more possible everyday.  Take a read and tell me what you think.

Andy

Walmart [NYSE:WMT] to Imbed RFID Tags on Clothes Beginning August 1

Walmart [NYSE:WMT] maintains imbedding the electronic identification tags is strictly to improve inventory management. Some critics point out that putting the tags on merchandise fringes on a violation of privacy.

Beginning August 1, 2010, clothing will be imbedded with a radio frequency identification (RFID) tag. The tags can be read with a hand-held scanner which will assist employees with the inventory and boost efficiency on the floor and in the warehouse.

Using RFID tags is a common practice for large retailers but most tags are located on pallets of merchandise and are used mostly to track inventory from factory to retail outlet. Some consumers are getting chaffed at the idea of having a tracking device in their shorts. One type of tracking device that is being implemented is a passive tag that can be tracked by anyone with a scanner tuned to the correct signal. The tag can be removed from clothing by the consumer, but the device will continue to be trackable even if it sits in a trash can or dumpster.

Once the large retailers such as Walmart start to initiate a program such as RFID tags other retail outlets usually follow suit. In some cases it is for control that the big retail outlets, like Walmart, have over the suppliers. It may also be that retail stores draw from the same supply network as Walmart so the clothes will have tags installed. Other retailers such as JC Penny and Bloomingdale’s have also begun to manage their inventory levels with smart tags.

Privacy advocates are worried that the smart tags are just another way for big business to glean personal information from consumers. A RFID tag could be scanned as people walk the store or tracked even outside the store to see what else the person has purchased.

Even if the original purpose of RFID tags is to track inventory and to increase efficiency, there will always be someone who will use the tool, not for its intended purpose, but use it for personal gain and fraudulent activity.

So…what do you think?  Are we getting closer to 666?  Do you think that what the merchants are doing is opening the door?  I’d really like your comments.

Andy

4 Comments by Pastor Andy on August 3, 2010
filed in Uncategorized
« Older Posts
The Disciple Makers Blog